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Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Hell hath no fury like the dreams of a woman taking Chantix

Carolynn's comment about violent dreams reminded me of a dream I had a few weeks ago. 
Or so. 
It doesn't matter when, really, although I do think it preceded the Tropical Storm Irene inundation...

...and the Labor Day inundation.

I think of the dream . . . and it felt like a dream, not a nightmare, despite the way it rolled out of my id . . . in relation to the storms only because I wonder . . . was I reacting somehow to the unsteadiness in the atmosphere? Or was it just one of the famous Vividly Violent Chantix Dreams? I can hardly believe that most dreams only last three to five seconds (something I read recently) because this one seemed to go on for weeks. 

Anyway...

There were two of us in the dream: a man, familiar to dreaming me and unknown to my waking self, and me. He and I were close. Not lovers, not friends, but somewhere on the edge between the two. Throughout the dream, over and over again, I would begin to trust him and his good will . . . and then he would do something or make a remark that would cut me, humiliate me, leave me not knowing what to say, how to react. 
At last, my hurt feelings turned to cold rage. He had one more chance. I knew he'd blow it and he did. He made yet another barbed joke at my expense.
I turned and drove a long two-tined barbecue fork into his throat even as he still smirked at me. I could feel the tines' sharp points passing through resisting tissues. He fell backward onto the floor and lay staring at me in shock, struggling only feebly. I was strong; I would not let him free. 
I woke up, leaving my dream self holding him pinned to the floor by his neck.

BBQ fork by ~princess-distracto 


Aren't you glad you don't live in my head?

17 comments:

Jinksy said...

Blimey! I thought me dreams were bad enough! lol

Carolynn said...

Wow. *smirk* I wonder where THAT came from...usually the violence is aimed at me, in my dreams, and I'm doing my best to elude capture. Oh man...a psych major would have a field day with us!

Freda said...

Amazing power and vigour. In my dreams I am always a wimp.

C-ingspots said...

Damn woman!! That's pretty awesome actually, because having the power seems much less common than not having the power in dreams. That'll teach him to smirk at you...

Wanda..... said...

Who are you angry with? Just kidding June, maybe you solved a nagging problem and then just replayed it in your dreams!

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

"It was the Chantix what done it , your Honour ."

Linda Myers said...

I've heard Chantrix dreams are pretty wild. Hang in there! You'll feel so much better when you're a nonsmoker on your own.

Grandmother said...

First of all, good for you for becoming a non smoker. Secondly, way to express your anger and take care of yourself!

Blipfillypicklepoo said...

June, your dream companion sounds like someone I used to know. Thanks for taking care of him for me!

Pauline said...

Crikey! That was some vivd dream - do you ever fall back asleep after waking and reenter a dream? Or dream the same dream on consecutive nights? Perhaps you could come to a different ending...

hahaha the word verification is hed-u-lies

Barb said...

I'm being really careful about my comment! (And I'm definitely NOT smirking...)

#1Nana said...

My husband took chantix after his heart attack when he was finally motivated to quit smoking. He also had vivid dreams and it sometimes took him a moment or two after he woke up to recognize that he was dreaming! But it worked, he hasn't had a cigarette for two years now. I hope it working for you...

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Monica Devine said...

I'm very interested in the dream world. I've read that all of the characters in a dream are manifestations of yourself; different characters representing various aspects of a single psyche. For ten years, I had the same recurring dream where i was on a college campus, looking for a place to live, but every apartment was taken. My waking days were filled with a constant state of frustration...but I never figured out why. Fascinating way the mind works

esbboston said...

Yes, I am glad.

I link my dream stories together in my blog by putting a link at the bottom of each one that points to the next older one. My favorite dream was being married to two out of three of the Dixie Chicks, but also living platonically with the third one in a giant house. Wild.